You ever heard of a company called MacKay Hannah?
No, me neither. Apparently they focus on "contemporary public policy issues of interest to the public, private and voluntary sectors" according to their pisspoor website.
As I stifle a yawn I am trying to understand why MacKay Hannah think I may be interested in receiving their unsolicited emails.
And I am trying to figure out which part of "unsubscribe me from all mailing lists" they don't understand.
It seems the "unsubscribe" button on the various received emails does not work and four email requests to take me off their lists have fallen on deaf ears.
MacKay Hannah is run by Gail Hannah, who worked in local government, and former Scottish Government finance minister Angus MacKay. Hannah is responsible for "managing implementation" while MacKay does "strategic development". Maybe between them they can instruct their marketing team to strategically implement my removal from their mailing lists?
Friday, 6 November 2009
Thursday, 22 October 2009
Press Release Which Is Anything But The Mutt's Nuts
Is this the most pointless press release ever issued? L&B cops have appealed for help in finding puppies stolen in a break-in. Awww.
Now it might have potential for coverage but skip down to the Notes to Editor bit . . .
PUPPIES STOLEN, EDINBURGH
0800hrs, 20/10/09
Press Office, Fettes
Police in Edinburgh are appealing for information after four puppies were stolen from a flat in Albert Street on Friday (October 16).
The Staffordshire bull terrier pups were taken when the flat was broken into sometime between 11.30am and 1.45pm.
The puppies are eight weeks old, two of them are black, and two have brindle markings.
A police spokesperson said: “The owner is very upset at the loss of the puppies.
“We are appealing for anyone who might have seen people acting suspiciously in the area at the time, or from anyone who has heard of this kind of puppy being offered for sale, to contact police.”
Anyone with information is asked to contact Lothian and Borders Police on 0131 311 3131 or Crimestoppers in confidence and complete anonymity on 0800 555 111.
NOTE TO EDITORS: There are no images of the puppies available and the owner does not wish to speak to the media
ENDS
Issued by Martin Couper on 20/10/2009 08:05:01
If Martin Couper or his bosses at Fettes press office had any balls, even the canine variety, they would have told the cop that asked for this release to be issued that he/she was barking.
No pics and owner doesn't want to play ball - simple solution - take a hike. But what about the waste of resources in putting this together and then polluting news desk in-boxes with a release which has no chance of getting hacks to bite?
Try getting the media office to answer the dog and bone when you have an urgent inquiry about an ongoing incident or suspicious death and that's a different matter entirely - you've got more chance of them showing you their puppies.
Anyway, that's enough dog puns for one day, back to the real job . . .
Now it might have potential for coverage but skip down to the Notes to Editor bit . . .
PUPPIES STOLEN, EDINBURGH
0800hrs, 20/10/09
Press Office, Fettes
Police in Edinburgh are appealing for information after four puppies were stolen from a flat in Albert Street on Friday (October 16).
The Staffordshire bull terrier pups were taken when the flat was broken into sometime between 11.30am and 1.45pm.
The puppies are eight weeks old, two of them are black, and two have brindle markings.
A police spokesperson said: “The owner is very upset at the loss of the puppies.
“We are appealing for anyone who might have seen people acting suspiciously in the area at the time, or from anyone who has heard of this kind of puppy being offered for sale, to contact police.”
Anyone with information is asked to contact Lothian and Borders Police on 0131 311 3131 or Crimestoppers in confidence and complete anonymity on 0800 555 111.
NOTE TO EDITORS: There are no images of the puppies available and the owner does not wish to speak to the media
ENDS
Issued by Martin Couper on 20/10/2009 08:05:01
If Martin Couper or his bosses at Fettes press office had any balls, even the canine variety, they would have told the cop that asked for this release to be issued that he/she was barking.
No pics and owner doesn't want to play ball - simple solution - take a hike. But what about the waste of resources in putting this together and then polluting news desk in-boxes with a release which has no chance of getting hacks to bite?
Try getting the media office to answer the dog and bone when you have an urgent inquiry about an ongoing incident or suspicious death and that's a different matter entirely - you've got more chance of them showing you their puppies.
Anyway, that's enough dog puns for one day, back to the real job . . .
Friday, 2 October 2009
Turbo Bob Wins Made Up Quote Award
It's been a while, but in an effort to breathe new life in to this blog, here goes . . .
Made Up Quote of the Week goes to - who else, but my old pals at Lothian and Borders Police press office for this little belter from Robert Turbyne on a "counter terrorism initiative".
But before the made up quote, how about this for classic police wank speak - "Superintendent Mark Williams, who hold the Counter-Terrorism portfolio for the City of Edinburgh".
WTF. Does that mean Mr Williams deals in shares in Edinburgh firms who specialise in counter terrorism; does he own properties in which counter terrorism staff are housed or is he in fact in charge of the force's counter terrorism unit?
If you can be bothered reading about this police exercise which brings "All Communities Together" you can read it here. Except you can't because wee Turbo Bob can't be arsed putting it on the Force's website, so there is no link.
But did you see what he did there? Capped up the A, C and T just in case thicko journos didn't get the intended message of, er, bringing communites together. Clever stuff indeed.
Anyway - to the made up quote, from a, ahem, a member of the public who attended a pilot session “The exercise suddenly puts you on the other side of the table and gives you an insight as to the challenges and decisions that the Police have to make each day. It certainly stresses the importance of regular interaction between both the police and the local community on a day-to-day basis."
Note to press office: Joe Public does not talk of "challenges and decisions" or "regular interaction" between the police and local community. But press officers with too much time on their hands and little imagination do.
Made Up Quote of the Week goes to - who else, but my old pals at Lothian and Borders Police press office for this little belter from Robert Turbyne on a "counter terrorism initiative".
But before the made up quote, how about this for classic police wank speak - "Superintendent Mark Williams, who hold the Counter-Terrorism portfolio for the City of Edinburgh".
WTF. Does that mean Mr Williams deals in shares in Edinburgh firms who specialise in counter terrorism; does he own properties in which counter terrorism staff are housed or is he in fact in charge of the force's counter terrorism unit?
If you can be bothered reading about this police exercise which brings "All Communities Together" you can read it here. Except you can't because wee Turbo Bob can't be arsed putting it on the Force's website, so there is no link.
But did you see what he did there? Capped up the A, C and T just in case thicko journos didn't get the intended message of, er, bringing communites together. Clever stuff indeed.
Anyway - to the made up quote, from a, ahem, a member of the public who attended a pilot session “The exercise suddenly puts you on the other side of the table and gives you an insight as to the challenges and decisions that the Police have to make each day. It certainly stresses the importance of regular interaction between both the police and the local community on a day-to-day basis."
Note to press office: Joe Public does not talk of "challenges and decisions" or "regular interaction" between the police and local community. But press officers with too much time on their hands and little imagination do.
Saturday, 29 August 2009
Times Reporter Blows It
This page 2 Correction in today's The Times is worth reproducing. If you're going to blow it you may as well completely blow it.
Keva McKibbin ("Modern Weddings", Magazine, August 22) did not say that she was "blown off her face" when she first met her husband, but that she was "blown off her feet". We apologise for any embarrassment caused by our reporter's mishearing.
Tee hee.
Keva McKibbin ("Modern Weddings", Magazine, August 22) did not say that she was "blown off her face" when she first met her husband, but that she was "blown off her feet". We apologise for any embarrassment caused by our reporter's mishearing.
Tee hee.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
